How Forgiveness Gets You What You Want
Your Unresolved Disputes Create Obstacles in Your Life
Do you have anyone in your life that you need to forgive? Until you do, you are harming your health and putting your life on hold.
Even if you believe you have largely forgotten the incident or the person, a part of your brain remains focused on the bitterness and injustice. It festers and creates more bitterness and injustice in your life. Bitterness and injustice don’t get you what you want.
But there’s lots of good news:
– Firstly, you don’t need to speak to the other person about this issue.
– Secondly, you’re going to use disputes to learn the following:
a) why you have disputes
b) how to use disputes as an asset to learn what is blocking your life
c) how to unblock your life
d) how to get what you want in your life
- How you create these incidents in your life.
- The truth behind blame.
- How unhelpful programs in our brain block the flow of our life.
- Why taking responsibility for your life gives you so much power, and of course… what you want.
- How to use the dispute as an asset to learn about you.
- How to use all this to get what you want in your life.
Why the Dispute is Your Responsibility
To begin with, you must be clear that things don’t just happen to us. It’s quite simple, really. You create everything that happens to you. You’ve created your health, family, relationships, career, wealth/poverty, and happiness/sadness. Everything. This claim is grounded in science. Quantum theory has proved that what you think creates what you are experiencing in your life.
Most people don’t understand that they are creating their life with every thought. Quantum theory has proved that what you think creates what you are experiencing in your life. The mystery lifts and life makes sense.
With this in mind, it follows that if you create your life, you should take responsibility for any altercations you have. This doesn’t mean you go from blaming other people for your issues, to blaming yourself. There is just ‘no blame’. Find out why in the next few paragraphs.
Why Blame Doesn’t Help You
Blame can feel deliciously sweet; you feel absolved of the situation and it’s a chance to complain and have others feel sorry for you. You can always find someone to blame such as the government, your parents, partner, friends, employer etc. This is an emotional addiction similar to smoking, alcohol or drugs. Instead, you can use these incidents to better understand yourself and get what you want. You have that choice.
How Your Attitudes and Beliefs Block What You Want
Behind most of our thoughts we have rigid and embedded attitudes, beliefs and habits, which are unknown and secret to us. They hinder us; we unconsciously think according to these programs; we see things according to these unhelpful filters and we act impulsively. But if you become aware of these, you can replace them with new powerful thoughts that take you to what you want.
How a Dispute Can Help You Get What You Want
Become aware of your limiting attitudes and beliefs by utilizing your interactions (or disputes) with others. The way people treat you correlates with the thoughts you have and how you treat yourself. They’re providing feedback…free!
Your thoughts vibrate at a certain frequency and these attract to you people with like thoughts. Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘We’re on the same wavelength?’
In observing how people treat you, you get to understand what you are thinking. They are a ‘mirror’ for you and if you reject yourself, guess what? You’re going to attract people who do that to you.
Through others, you learn what you can change in yourself… so you can start getting what you want.
Simply put, your thoughts are creating your life. So wisely use your thoughts to change your life to what you want.
Do You Want Other People to Control You?
Now, if you don’t choose to take responsibility for the dispute you are effectively handing that person your power, because they now decide how you feel; whether you are happy or sad. And remember, if you focus on retaliation, people will retaliate upon you. Life becomes harder and you are effectively in a self-created prison.
Or you can stop waiting for others to ‘behave’, so you can be happy. By releasing them you unlock your prison and gain freedom instead – you decide how you feel and what you want out of life.
7 Ways to Use a Dispute to Get What You Want
1. a) Decide to be open and ready to discover more about you.
b) Create the intention to know, this is vital.
c) See blame for what it is. Accept that although it may be hard to be honest with yourself, you’ll do it anyway. Once you’ve seen blame for what it is, you are instantly more powerful and free to get what you want.
2. Take a stance of no blame, no right and wrong. No-one is to blame; just remain curious as to the message for you in the incident.
3. Create and contemplate questions, such as,
’What message am I getting from this person?’
‘What part of myself do I see in this person?’
‘What are my attitudes and beliefs that created this situation?’
‘How can I evolve from having this experience: what can I change?’
Consider yourself worth the investment.
4. Look for aspects of yourself where you feel inadequate i.e. deprived, inferior, bitter, guilty, anxious, sad, self-pitying, jealous, hateful etc.
5. Acknowledge it once you’ve seen something in yourself. In doing so you release it and this brings peace and freedom to you. It really is that easy.
6. Design some powerful thoughts that you’d like to have to develop yourself further. Go for anything you want such as happiness, confidence or a relationship, a material item etc. Some examples:
‘I feel safe, confident and secure in myself.’
‘I have a fulfilling, loving relationship.’
‘I get what I want.’
‘I am… ‘ etc
Place these around your home and workplace, and say them out loud when you see them. As you see these thoughts in your mind, you are creating them in reality.
Because forgiveness happens within you and by removing blame you help yourself, there is no need to say anything to the other person. Acknowledge to yourself that you are at peace with this person and that you consciously release the altercation from your life.
Do you know anyone who would like to get anything they want? Visit www.janetpoole.com for a look at the book ‘Just Like That! ’ How to Get Anything You Want. You are entitled to get what you want and be happy. Find out how and why. The book uses the forgotten truth of ancient wisdom to lift you out of restrictive current beliefs and provide an in-depth step-by-step approach to aligning your thoughts with what you want. It also offers exercises that help integrate the knowledge into your life.