Self Development

Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom (Part 2)

Published on January 8, 2015July 10, 2016 by Janet

flowers-painting-1391872491b4f We use diplomacy as a SURVIVAL technique.
If we’re in survival mode we’re not free.

This is about being able to live in truth, YOUR truth!

“Your experience is unique, as is your truth. Everyone’s version of the truth is different, because everyone’s knowledge and experience is different.”
~~ How to Get Anything You Want – Just Like That! (P. 29)
(click here to get the first 3 chapters free)

Today we’re talking about all those excuses and explanations we use when the truth feels too uncomfortable.

Let’s imagine a simple scenario –
you’re late for an appointment or need to change one.

Would your first impulse be to put forward an excuse or explanation?

There’s a subtlety here that sneaks by unnoticed and it’s to do with your real belief about your power.

If you’re offering excuses and explanations it means you’re being pushed around by people or circumstances; you’re not free.

It means something out of your control happened TO YOU and you couldn’t help it.

Let’s always remember YOU ARE POWERFUL…
YOU ARE CREATING EVERYTHING in every moment by
what you THINK.

This applies to everyone.

You and the other person involved are BOTH creating… not just “now and then”… in ALL circumstances.

Most of us are intending to do the right thing, so none of this is malicious, but let’s all take responsibility for what happens —
You created being late.
They created you being late.

Let’s acknowledge that.
Let’s embrace that.
Let’s stop giving your power away.

As mentioned in part 1, this is not about being insensitive, arrogant, hurting anyone’s feelings or assigning blame; we can be gentle while speaking our truth.

This is about LOVE and about recognizing we cannot make other people happy.

The best thing you can do for another person is love yourself and live your own truth.

That way you lead the way for others to do the same.
If you don’t, everyone continues around in circles unsuccessfully trying to make others happy.

Scratch the surface of an excuse and you’ll find… fear.

Are you concerned the truth will make you look unreliable, disorganized, irresponsible or uncaring?

Consider this…

A genuinely confident, self-sufficient person who loves themselves has none of the above concerns and has no need to explain themselves.

Let’s dive deeper.

What about the issue of hurting someone’s feelings.
If that’s your concern you haven’t yet fully grasped your power and that of others.

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”
~~ Mahatma Ghandi

By feeling the need to manage another person’s feelings you believe they rely on you to feel good. Wouldn’t that mean you’re also depending on others making you feel good?

Do you see how this works?

Would you be okay with knowing others had to handle you with diplomacy to keep you happy — and in the process couldn’t tell you the truth ?

What if you could love yourself so much you can hear and handle the truth, no matter what?

I’m not saying that’s easy but what a powerful way to live!
That’s FREEDOM and if you want it you can have it.

Be the example and others will follow.

It’s a powerful moment when you really “get” that:

you do not have to play the game of keeping others happy
you do not depend on others for your happiness
others do not depend on you

you’re big and bold… YOU’RE FREE!

If you want to be FREE, what can you do?

1. Start by observing people making excuses or explaining themselves.
Not to judge, merely to learn.

2. Play with speaking your truth or saying what you want without excuses and explanations. It will seem strange at first.

I know personally how confronting it can be to speak and live your truth…
… but what happens if you don’t?

You’ll see, if the people in your life don’t value the truth like you do, you’ll start shifting into new circumstances and people who do!

You’ll start enjoying love and FREEDOM beyond your wildest imagination.

This has been my experience.

Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom (Part 1)

Published on January 1, 2015July 10, 2016 by Janet

Even though we celebrate January 1^st as the start of a new year, every day is the start of another year.

What if we lived every day of our year in absolute TRUTH?

You see, a person who is “diplomatic”
is NOT FREE.

Do ever feel the need to be diplomatic?
If so, are you stunting your spiritual growth and freedom?

FREEDOM begins with TRUTH.

“The high-minded man must care more for the truth
than for what people think.”
~~ Aristotle

Today I’m delving into the nuances of FREEDOM because while we may be born free, most people do not live in freedom.

We may consider ourselves honest in our dealings with others, the fact is we tend to avoid the TRUTH or soften it with diplomacy.

Note: Your TRUTH is always unique to you (see free 3 chapters of my book page 29)

If you can’t speak your truth, you’re not free.

This is a contentious issue and this article may need some contemplation.

This isn’t about right and wrong, merely allow these ideas to linger as a maybe.

Stay with me if you can.

Why do we avoid the TRUTH?

Because the truth, by itself, can seem cold and harsh.

Could it be diplomacy is just a socially acceptable way of hiding the truth?

Many societies glorify diplomacy. There was a time when our survival depended on our “diplomatic abilities” because being out of favour meant dire consequences such as being cast out of the tribe.

Rocking the boat was just too dangerous. In some societies this is still the case and if that’s your situation I suggest you proceed with caution.

This is no longer the case for many of us but the desire to fit in and be liked is recorded in our soul, it remains in our DNA and continues to push us around.

If fear of disapproval is a big one for you but you’d like to evolve beyond this planet, then it’s important you learn to master it.

Allow me to add this is not about assigning blame or being deliberately insensitive and arrogant; it is possible to be gentle while speaking the truth.

Our aim is to always treat others with love and respect, and never intentionally hurt people’s feelings.

We want to come from a place of LOVE and believe it or not this topic is all about LOVE. Loving yourself first and allowing that love to spill over to others.

LOVE and TRUTH are inextricably combined.

One can’t generalize of course, so there will be situations warranting a discussion, the key here is we generally explain ourselves way too much.

It’s time to live and speak your truth without fear of retribution.

If you believe you’ll be rejected or “cast out” for saying what you believe, then that’s your truth and you’ll live it.

If you believe you’re entitled to freedom then that’s your truth and you’ll be free.

As I often say, if we’re not speaking the truth then it surely must be a lie.

I, too, sometimes catch myself with the temptation to soften the truth. I insist on catching and correcting it because I so strongly believe we’re born free and ought to live free.

It starts with courage.

Do you have the courage to speak the truth so you can be FREE?

When you have the courage to liberate yourself through truth, you’re also giving others that gift.

Choose to step forward and lead the way.

Part 2 explains more: Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom

Is Anything Really Possible?

Published on December 18, 2014July 10, 2016 by Janet1 Comment

Henry Ford — “PRODUCE IT ANYWAY”

Most of us have big dreams but at some point we compromise.

There’s NO limit to the power of your mind.
You’re an infinite being.

Let’s allow that to be a reminder because our culture has misled us into thinking some things are possible, some impossible.

Send a message to someone on the other side of the world within seconds?
50 years ago they’d have said that’s impossible.

“When Henry Ford decided to produce his famous
V-8 motor, he chose to build an engine with the
entire eight cylinders cast in one block, and instructed
his engineers to produce a design for the engine.

The design was placed on paper, but the engineers
agreed, to a man, it was simply impossible to cast
an eight-cylinder engine-block in one piece.

Ford replied, “Produce it anyway.”

~~ Henry Ford

Remember… if you have a dream, then it’s possible to have it. Otherwise your imagination wouldn’t be capable of creating it.

IMAGINATION is where it all begins. Look around you.

Everything you see started in someone’s imagination.

3 Easy Steps to Create Anything You Want

1. Write a short story…

… as if telling a new friend about your life AS IT IS RIGHT NOW.
Write what you do each day, where you live, your financial situation, family, relationships, health and so on (be totally honest).

2. Now completely reverse the story.

Take each sentence and topic, TURN IT INTO WHAT YOU DO WANT and then enhance it. Use your power of imagination and IMAGEine yourself, picture yourself living this already.

3. Ask yourself, “Do I REALLY WANT this?”

If that’s a YES, great let’s keep going.
Now, I want you to ask yourself two questions.

i. “Am I ABLE to create this?”

The truth is, if you’re human, if you’re alive and breathing then YOU ARE ABLE.

There is NO LIMIT to who you are and what you can achieve NOR does it matter what happened in your past.
It only matters if you want this right now.

So right now say, “YES I AM ABLE”.

ii. Now ask yourself, “Am I WILLING?”

Am I willing to change?
Am I willing to take advice?
Am I willing to “fail”?
Am I willing to experience rejection?
Am I willing to do what it takes to have this?

If you can truly say, “YES, I AM WILLING” then you’ve already started creating your new results.

That may sound too simple but this is not complicated. Honestly, this is how I created the first and subsequent improvements in my life (explained in How to Get Anything You Want – Just Like That!).

I’m going to assume for this purpose you understand your thoughts create your reality. Keep that in mind and ask yourself what happens if you have no idea what you want?

How will you get what you want if you don’t even know what it is?

“The greatest story of all is Colonel Sanders.
He didn’t start until he was sixty-six on a freeway
bypass for his chicken shop. Anything is possible!”
~~ Robert Kiyosaki

What will happen if you keep focusing on what you DON’T want?

When you decide what you want and have a serious, burning desire to achieve it AND ARE WILLING to do what it takes… then you will have it AND your journey to get there will be the greatest fun you’ve ever had.

Whatever you FOCUS on, comes into being.

Once you’ve written your story and decided to have it, you’ve done something truly magical.

You’ve given yourself a BLUEPRINT of your FUTURE and a glimpse of your true potential. Often that’s all we need.Have fun… say YES to what you want and be WILLING to have it!

P.S. Henry Ford is one of my favourite inspirations. Look around next time you’re on the road. Henry Ford started it all and when he started manufacturing cars, he was it. For example, back then there were no companies manufacturing tyres, gearboxes, steering boxes etc. From start to finish, Ford did it all!

Play It Safe and Survive — Is That Enough?

Published on October 30, 2014July 10, 2016 by Janet

Hot Air balloon2 — DECIDE to follow your DREAMS

“You can play it safe, and I wouldn’t blame you for it.
You can continue as you’ve been doing, and you’ll survive, but is that what you want? Is that enough?”
~~ J.M. Darhower

You’re an infinite being.
Your potential is infinite.

Why would you merely survive and crimp your infinite outrageous potential?

Let’s put it this way, what would you be doing if you were guaranteed success in all that you do?

If that inspires you, then let’s do something magnificent, something that makes you live large and feel fabulous!

BUT understand this… you can’t get to your new destination by following an old path.

You’re going to be traveling some uncharted territory.
This will be new for you, right?
It’s going to be unfamiliar, so you’re going to probably feel uneasy.
Discomfort is part of the adventure.

Embrace it.

Most people run at the first sign of discomfort.
Embracing your discomfort is noble.
It means you’re a courageous pioneer – of your own life.

The first step if you want to do something new is to make a DECISION.

Nothing happens without a DECISION and a decision comes BEFORE the “HOW” shows up.

Most people wait their whole life for the RIGHT HOW and RIGHT TIME.

They never live their dream.
The RIGHT HOW and RIGHT TIME never come.

Do this instead:
When you have a dream or discover a new opportunity ask yourself a simple question, “Does this make me feel excited?”
If it’s a YES, that’s all you need.

DECIDE… right here, right now. “I am doing it.”

You may feel a little scared, and that’s a good sign because it means you’re moving into something new.
We THRIVE on new experiences.

Making decisions is scary when we first start but it’s the ONLY WAY to create your dream.
Nothing happens without a DECISION.

Your dream and that you have it is no coincidence; it’s vital you start moving into living it.

One of the reasons the world is filled with sadness and depression is because people suppress their dreams and crimp their potential; suppression is another reason for illness.

The way to be happy, healthy and young is to DECIDE to follow your dreams and continually evolve and grow.

The SAFEST thing you can do is move forward into what you want!

Survival is not impressive, it’s not safe… choose to THRIVE!!!

Image

You Are The Way You Are For A Reason

Published on September 12, 2014February 14, 2016 by Janet

Snoopy Society tries to dictate who we ought to be, how we ought to look, what we wear, what we say and so on.

This causes us to aim to be like everyone else and fit in.

There’s no doubt it takes courage to step out of the herd mentality and follow the beat of your own drum but really and truly…
… everything else is a lie.

You may feel different to others, you may feel you’re not interesting enough, not good enough, you may feel no-one understands you.
You may feel ___(fill in the blank)__.

The truth is you don’t have to BE anything other than what you are.

You’re already wonderful!

What’s happening is that we naturally seek fuller expression of ourselves.

What’s beautiful about how you feel and the way you are right now, is that these things drive you into new directions so you express YOU more fully, have new experiences and do things you’ve never done before.

We’re always seeking to be better… we naturally seek MORE.

This is all perfect. Why?

Because your soul has a fundamental desire to do things it’s never done before.
Your soul LOVES GROWTH!

That’s the adventure of life!
The buzz… there’s nothing quite like it!

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud
was more painful than the risk
it took to blossom.” ~~ Anaïs Nin

Your soul is hungry for new experiences.
Your soul gains wisdom from new experiences.
That’s priceless because you carry wisdom into all eternity.
This is why doing something new FEELS SO GOOD!

You are the way you are for a reason.

Love the way you are because if you allow yourself to be you, you’ll naturally move into what’s right for you.

You’re happiest and most successful when you’re growing…
and especially when growing in ways ideal for YOU.

Image

Category: Self Development

Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom (Part 2)