What If You’ve Been Hypnotised into Believing You Can’t?

How can people suddenly do “the impossible” under hypnosis?

Consider these people under hypnosis:
– The person who stutters now talks fluently
– The weight-lifter can suddenly lift 25 more pounds

Incredible!

It makes you think doesn’t it.

Obviously they were always ABLE to do these things but turned off the ability through negative beliefs.

How does this happen?

10 Tips to Stop Blaming Others (and Start Feeling Fabulous!)

Is blaming your family, friends or colleagues keeping you stuck?

Relationships are often the cause of heartache, anger and resentment.

Did you know…
… one of the main ways we grow is through relationships?

The QUESTION is:
Are you willing to be happy and free?

Did you know most of us are not willing to give up blame so as to be happy!

Isn’t it weird how feeling bad feels so “good”?

It’s true! Blame and feeling bad can feel good, but it’s only momentary and it keeps us in prison.

Which is a terrible long term plan for happiness, and can lead to serious health issues!

If you are truly ready for long term happiness, read on.

When you’re with someone have you ever…

  • Felt angry
  • Felt jealous
  • Felt rejected or ignored
  • Felt hurt
  • Felt betrayed
  • Found fault with or criticized them
  • Seen them as arrogant or selfish
  • Seen them as blunt or unfriendly
  • Seen them as uncaring or disrespectful

If YES — then again read on!

These are feelings most of have felt.
But they are neither “good” nor “bad”.

But what is important is, if you’ve consciously noticed it (as opposed to unconsciously reacted) then you’ve already taken a huge step forward and can use this as a powerful opportunity to grow.

BUT, how do I grow through relationships?

First off, know that you’re always seeing yourself in the other person.
Yes, they have a message for you.

Notice:
What do they say to you?
How do they annoy you?
How do they make you feel?

These are secret messages that give insight into you and the issues you’ve suppressed.

I know… it can seem like a puzzle to work this out : )

4 Steps to “Getting the Message” From This Person

1. First you need COURAGE!
Congratulations! Choosing not to blame and instead looking for the message is a courageous act.

2. Make a DECISION that you are open and willing to get the message.
Obvious perhaps, but you need to be in the right frame of mind!

3. Next, find the CLUES the person is giving you.

Remember, you won’t see your entire self in others, you’ll only see slivers or small parts.

Your CLUES are those parts that annoy or hurt you and are your clues to learning more about yourself.

So, let’s discover those clues. Imagine that person now.
Say to yourself something like, “I feel ___(describe the feeling)____”
e.g. “I feel angry”
“I feel small”
“I feel rejected”
“They are arrogant, they are selfish.”

Create a list of anything that comes up for you.
Don’t analyse – just keep writing.

4. CONTEMPLATE that list of clues.
Once you’re lost in thought the answer will come.

Persevere because you will eventually get the answer — even if it takes months.

My personal story in my book is in Chapter 32 – Forgiveness and took me months, but I was determined to get the message. And you can too! The “aha-moment” was worth it and I successfully moved on.

“Forgiveness is not something you do for someone else;
it’s something you do for yourself.”

~~ Jim Beaver, Life’s That Way: A Memoir

3 Things That Will Make You Feel Good When Learning About Yourself:

1. Feel good because you’re not necessarily looking for stuff people might consider “bad” e.g. anger, hate, jealously.
It may be that you felt abandoned or rejected as a child. You may feel unworthy. You may have suppressed anger or it may be a limiting belief from childhood.

Don’t judge it. Let it be “IS”.

You don’t have to know why you feel that way, just acknowledge that you do.

Be open to discovering things like your own anger, arrogance or insistence on controlling others (yes, most of us love control).

2. Feel good because it’s not about moving the blame from others to you.
We’re too hard on ourselves (which is why we blame!). Rather this is merely an opportunity to learn more about you.

Don’t be hard on yourself because even those of us who ought to know better fall into this trap.

3. Feel good because you can choose to see the situation as an opportunity, rather than a problem.
(See Chapter 5 in my book – Challenges Are Powerful Opportunities For You)

Personally, I never want to miss an opportunity to grow because in the end my issue is there whether I deny it or not.

Now a Quick Check…

Is there anyone in your community who you feel did the wrong thing to you?

If so, it’s important to deal with it — now you know how.

3 Rewards When Moving On From Blame:

1. Clarity and peace
The feeling of clarity and peace is euphoric and your new insight means personal growth. Know thyself! One of our yearnings!

2. The person like “magic” seems to change
Oh how you wished the person would change! Well, when you move on from blame they will appear to do so. You will stop feeling anger, they’ll no longer seem arrogant, blunt or hurtful.

You may even form a closer relationship with them! (This often happens!)

3. You no longer rely on people’s behaviour
Whoo hoo! You no longer need others to behave a certain way so that you can be happy. You become happy no matter what. You make yourself happy; you are empowered.

Adversity Always Gets Your Attention

Remember of course you can also see your own love, kindness and generosity reflected in others but it’s always the adversity that gets our attention!

The adversity makes us more inclined to look at ourselves –  where most of us use any excuse to avoid looking at ourselves.

When we avoid the opportunity it will always come again in the form of someone else.

This has probably been happening all your life (without you even knowing it… until now)!

Have you ever said, “Why does this always happens to me”?

“When you blame and criticize others, you are avoiding some truth about yourself.”
~~ Deepak Chopra

Let’s face it now and move forward!

When Is It Time to Move On?

Now, for clarity’s sake — please know, it is unnecessary to keep an angry, hurtful person in your life.

Feel free to move on as long as you can genuinely say you’ve been honest with yourself and contemplated what you could learn.

I’m not saying this is easy but it’s worth it because you’ll feel fabulous!

There you have it – 10 Tips to Stop Blaming Others!

Image Credit

Related Reading On This Site:

10 Reasons Loving Yourself Gets You What You Want
(If you’re going to release blame, make it easy — start with loving yourself ♥)
Why… You’re Worth It!

Your Troubled Relationships – Could This Be The Hidden Cause? (Part 1 of 2)
Family Disputes – Tips to Laugh More, Cry Less (Part 1 of 3)

Related Reading from Other Sites:

How to Stop Playing The Blame Game
Stop Blaming Other People (and why it will help you)
Blaming others for your problems

This is Janet Poole; I believe in finding better ways to live your life and grow your business.

I believe in sharing those ideas!

Better Ways. More Freedom.

Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom (Part 2)

flowers-painting-1391872491b4fWe use diplomacy as a SURVIVAL technique.
If we’re in survival mode we’re not free.

This is about being able to live in truth, YOUR truth!

(Click here for Part 1)

“Your experience is unique, as is your truth. Everyone’s version of the truth is different, because everyone’s knowledge and experience is different.”
~~ How to Get Anything You Want – Just Like That! (P. 29)
(click here to get the first 3 chapters free)

Today we’re talking about all those excuses and explanations we use when the truth feels too uncomfortable.

Let’s imagine a simple scenario –
you’re late for an appointment or need to change one.

Would your first impulse be to put forward an excuse or explanation?

There’s a subtlety here that sneaks by unnoticed and it’s to do with your real belief about your power.

If you’re offering excuses and explanations it means you’re being pushed around by people or circumstances; you’re not free.

It means something out of your control happened TO YOU and you couldn’t help it.

Let’s always remember YOU ARE POWERFUL…
YOU ARE CREATING EVERYTHING in every moment by
what you THINK.

This applies to everyone.

You and the other person involved are BOTH creating… not just “now and then”… in ALL circumstances.

Most of us are intending to do the right thing, so none of this is malicious, but let’s all take responsibility for what happens —
You created being late.
They created you being late.

Let’s acknowledge that.
Let’s embrace that.
Let’s stop giving your power away.

As mentioned in part 1, this is not about being insensitive, arrogant, hurting anyone’s feelings or assigning blame; we can be gentle while speaking our truth.

This is about LOVE and about recognizing we cannot make other people happy.

The best thing you can do for another person is love yourself and live your own truth.

That way you lead the way for others to do the same.
If you don’t, everyone continues around in circles unsuccessfully trying to make others happy.

Scratch the surface of an excuse and you’ll find… fear.

Are you concerned the truth will make you look unreliable, disorganized, irresponsible or uncaring?

Consider this…

A genuinely confident, self-sufficient person who loves themselves has none of the above concerns and has no need to explain themselves.

Let’s dive deeper.

What about the issue of hurting someone’s feelings.
If that’s your concern you haven’t yet fully grasped your power and that of others.

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”
~~ Mahatma Ghandi

By feeling the need to manage another person’s feelings you believe they rely on you to feel good. Wouldn’t that mean you’re also depending on others making you feel good?

Do you see how this works?

Would you be okay with knowing others had to handle you with diplomacy to keep you happy — and in the process couldn’t tell you the truth ?

What if you could love yourself so much you can hear and handle the truth, no matter what?

I’m not saying that’s easy but what a powerful way to live!
That’s FREEDOM and if you want it you can have it.

Be the example and others will follow.

It’s a powerful moment when you really “get” that:

  • you do not have to play the game of keeping others happy
  • you do not depend on others for your happiness
  • others do not depend on you
  • you’re big and bold… YOU’RE FREE!

If you want to be FREE, what can you do?

1. Start by observing people making excuses or explaining themselves.
Not to judge, merely to learn.

2. Play with speaking your truth or saying what you want without excuses and explanations. It will seem strange at first.

I know personally how confronting it can be to speak and live your truth…
      … but what happens if you don’t?

You’ll see, if the people in your life don’t value the truth like you do, you’ll start shifting into new circumstances and people who do!

You’ll start enjoying love and FREEDOM beyond your wildest imagination.

This has been my experience.

Related Reading:

10 Reasons Loving Yourself Gets You What You Want
7 Things Happy People Do – They Approve of Themselves (Part 4 of 7)

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This is Janet Poole and I believe in freedom and living our true potential.

I believe in finding better ways to live a better life.

I have searched the world to find the best ways to grow, get permanent change and achieve your wildest dreams — I have found it in the program Thinking Into Results.

Better Ways. More Freedom.

Contact Janet Poole here

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Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom (Part 1)

Even though we celebrate January 1st as the start of a new year, every day is the start of another year.

What if we lived every day of our year in absolute TRUTH?

You see, a person who is “diplomatic”
is NOT FREE.

Do ever feel the need to be diplomatic?
If so, are you stunting your spiritual growth and freedom?

FREEDOM begins with TRUTH.

“The high-minded man must care more for the truth
than for what people think.”
~~ Aristotle

Today I’m delving into the nuances of FREEDOM because while we may be born free, most people do not live in freedom.

We may consider ourselves honest in our dealings with others, the fact is we tend to avoid the TRUTH or soften it with diplomacy.

Note: Your TRUTH is always unique to you (see free 3 chapters of my book page 29)

If you can’t speak your truth, you’re not free.

This is a contentious issue and this article may need some contemplation.

This isn’t about right and wrong, merely allow these ideas to linger as a maybe.

Stay with me if you can.

Why do we avoid the TRUTH?

Because the truth, by itself, can seem cold and harsh.

Could it be diplomacy is just a socially acceptable way of hiding the truth?

Many societies glorify diplomacy. There was a time when our survival depended on our “diplomatic abilities” because being out of favour meant dire consequences such as being cast out of the tribe.

Rocking the boat was just too dangerous. In some societies this is still the case and if that’s your situation I suggest you proceed with caution.

This is no longer the case for many of us but the desire to fit in and be liked is recorded in our soul, it remains in our DNA and continues to push us around.

If fear of disapproval is a big one for you but you’d like to evolve beyond this planet, then it’s important you learn to master it.

Allow me to add this is not about assigning blame or being deliberately insensitive and arrogant; it is possible to be gentle while speaking the truth.

Our aim is to always treat others with love and respect, and never intentionally hurt people’s feelings.

We want to come from a place of LOVE and believe it or not this topic is all about LOVE. Loving yourself first and allowing that love to spill over to others.

LOVE and TRUTH are inextricably combined.

One can’t generalize of course, so there will be situations warranting a discussion, the key here is we generally explain ourselves way too much.

It’s time to live and speak your truth without fear of retribution.

If you believe you’ll be rejected or “cast out” for saying what you believe, then that’s your truth and you’ll live it.

If you believe you’re entitled to freedom then that’s your truth and you’ll be free.

As I often say, if we’re not speaking the truth then it surely must be a lie.

I, too, sometimes catch myself with the temptation to soften the truth. I insist on catching and correcting it because I so strongly believe we’re born free and ought to live free.

It starts with courage.

Do you have the courage to speak the truth so you can be FREE?

When you have the courage to liberate yourself through truth, you’re also giving others that gift.

Choose to step forward and lead the way.

Part 2 explains more: Drop Diplomacy and Choose Freedom

Related Reading:

Are You Free?
Do You Think For Yourself? Here’s How to Start
Why it’s a Trap For You to Tow the Line
Why Mainstream Thinking Gives You Mainstream Results

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This is Janet Poole and I believe in freedom and living our true potential.

I believe in finding better ways to live a better life.

I have searched the world to find the best ways to grow, get permanent change and achieve your wildest dreams — I have found it in the program Thinking Into Results.

Better Ways. More Freedom.

Contact Janet Poole here

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Is Anything Really Possible?

Henry Ford — “PRODUCE IT ANYWAY”

Most of us have big dreams but at some point we  compromise.

There’s NO limit to the power of your mind.
You’re an infinite being.

Let’s allow that to be a reminder because our culture has misled us into thinking some things are possible, some impossible.

Send a message to someone on the other side of the world within seconds?
50 years ago they’d have said that’s impossible.

“When Henry Ford decided to produce his famous
V-8 motor, he chose to build an engine with the
entire eight cylinders cast in one block, and instructed
his engineers to produce a design for the engine.

The design was placed on paper, but the engineers
agreed, to a man, it was simply impossible to cast
an eight-cylinder engine-block in one piece.

Ford replied, “Produce it anyway.”

~~ Henry Ford

Remember… if you have a dream, then it’s possible to have it. Otherwise your imagination wouldn’t be capable of creating it.

IMAGINATION is where it all begins. Look around you.

Everything you see started in someone’s imagination.

3 Easy Steps to Create Anything You Want

1. Write a short story…

… as if telling a new friend about your life AS IT IS RIGHT NOW.
Write what you do each day, where you live, your financial situation, family, relationships, health and so on (be totally honest).

2. Now completely reverse the story.

Take each sentence and topic, TURN IT INTO WHAT YOU DO WANT and then enhance it. Use your power of imagination and IMAGEine yourself, picture yourself living this already.

3. Ask yourself, “Do I REALLY WANT this?”

If that’s a YES, great let’s keep going.
Now, I want you to ask yourself two questions.

i. “Am I ABLE to create this?”

The truth is, if you’re human, if you’re alive and breathing then YOU ARE ABLE.

There is NO LIMIT to who you are and what you can achieve NOR does it matter what happened in your past.
It only matters if you want this right now.

So right now say, “YES I AM ABLE”.

ii. Now ask yourself, “Am I WILLING?”

Am I willing to change?
Am I willing to take advice?
Am I willing to “fail”?
Am I willing to experience rejection?
Am I willing to do what it takes to have this?

If you can truly say, “YES, I AM WILLING” then you’ve already started creating your new results.

That may sound too simple but this is not complicated. Honestly, this is how I created the first and subsequent improvements in my life (explained in How to Get Anything You Want – Just Like That!).

I’m going to assume for this purpose you understand your thoughts create your reality. Keep that in mind and ask yourself what happens if you have no idea what you want?

How will you get what you want if you don’t even know what it is?

“The greatest story of all is Colonel Sanders.
He didn’t start until he was sixty-six on a freeway
bypass for his chicken shop. Anything is possible!”
~~ Robert Kiyosaki

What will happen if you keep focusing on what you DON’T want?

When you decide what you want and have a serious, burning desire to achieve it AND ARE WILLING to do what it takes… then you will have it AND your journey to get there will be the greatest fun you’ve ever had.

Whatever you FOCUS on, comes into being.

Once you’ve written your story and decided to have it, you’ve done something truly magical.

You’ve given yourself a BLUEPRINT of your FUTURE and a glimpse of your true potential. Often that’s all we need.Have fun… say YES to what you want and be WILLING to have it!

P.S. Henry Ford is one of my favourite inspirations. Look around next time you’re on the road. Henry Ford started it all and when he started manufacturing cars, he was it. For example, back then there were no companies  manufacturing tyres, gearboxes, steering boxes etc. From start to finish, Ford did it all!

Related Reading:

Dream Big
What Does It Mean When a Person Says, “Something is Missing in My Life”?
Are You Brave Enough to Use The Power of Your Mind?

This is Janet Poole and I believe in freedom and living our true potential.

I believe in finding better ways to live a better life.

I have searched the world to find the best ways to grow, get permanent change and achieve your wildest dreams — I have found it in the program Thinking Into Results.

Better Ways. More Freedom.

Contact Janet Poole here

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