Has Your Pursuit of the Material Been at the Expense of Happiness?

It’s hard to imagine being happy with less ‘stuff’. But that’s exactly what Kevin McCloud so elegantly demonstrates in his very entertaining DVD ‘Slumming It’.

Happy in a Slum?

The people of Dharavi are happy. What does this mean for those of us who don’t live in slums and yet still struggle to find happiness? Does the beautiful home you’re striving for in suburbia bring you more happiness than those living in a slum?

“I don’t care too much for money, money can’t buy me love.”

            John Lennon

Why Watching ‘Slumming It’ Will Help You Be Happy

For us in watching this DVD we’re without the sense of smell, but Kevin McCloud so very cleverly sticks our nose into everything else. ‘Slumming It’ gives you in-the-face perspective; it reminds you of what really matters in life. You’ll get an immediate lift and most likely see your life with new eyes.

Several people I’ve spoken to have said it was one of the best shows they’ve ever seen.

We were about to re-paint our bathroom when we watched ‘Slumming It’ and afterward my husband said, ‘Well, that’s it… we no longer need to paint the bathroom’. And that’s exactly it, although we still painted, we lost the urgency and got the message loud and clear yet again that this type of thing really doesn’t matter.

‘Slumming It’ shows you what does matter. And it’s not a glossy bathroom.

Why is the Slum Dharavi So Unique?

Kevin McCloud takes the cameraman (sometimes too easy to forget there’s a talented cameraman alongside him!) into all avenues of Dharavi, a slum that sits on only one square mile (1.3 kms) of valuable land in Mumbai.

Incredibly, 1 million people live there.

Often it’s 20 people to a tiny 4-roomed house; beds are made up each night in living spaces. Imagine sleeping in your kitchen tonight with 5 others. My quick calculation means that’s about 200 people living with you on your average house block (surrounded by a million others).

Along with that there’s no sanitation or running water; I do agree these are serious issues which cause illness in Dharavi. There are a astonishing 500 people to 1 toilet. Each toilet juts out over a river which serves as the plumbing.

Why Are the People of Dharavi Happy?

The good news. In Dharavi along with happiness there’s no crime. Repeat: No Crime. 85% of the people are employed. Dharavi has a thriving community. As Kevin McCloud says, there is no danger of an elderly person dying alone in their apartment and being found 3 months later. In Sydney last year shockingly an elderly woman was found 8 years later. In Dharavi, the elderly are included in everyday life; everyone is useful. They work together as a team and support each other.

One of my observations was that when women have babies, they have support 24×7 from umpteen experienced women. The village we’ve lost. I’ll bet their level of post-natal depression is negligible and the women probably don’t even use the term.

Why Do We Want More Stuff?

If we really dig down, the reason we want stuff is to appear successful to others. As if appearing successful makes us happy. It doesn’t. Deep down however, we think it does. We believe if we have enough stuff (to show off) we’ll eventually score happiness. Wrong again. There’s no happy ending to collecting stuff.

Consider this: if you were the only person on Earth and already had what you needed, would you want more possessions?

“It is preoccupation with possessions, more than anything else, that prevents us from living freely and nobly.”

Henry David Thoreau

And What… NO Spoilt Brats?

The children of Dharavi are happy, teenagers don’t have a desperate need for privacy, they’re not grumpy, they’re relaxed and interact freely with adults, the kids have no useless gadgets to entertain and rob them of patience and creativity (my kids no longer have those gadgets and they’re happy again. Phew. A story in itself.)

If you’re interested in finding happiness, discuss Dharavi next time you’re with friends. If you’re out walking or sitting quietly, I suggest contemplating the strong points of such a life. You’ll be amazed at your realizations.

Transform your life: lose your obsession with possessions.

2 Tips to Satisfy & Give You a Happy Life

I realize your life is likely different to that of Dharavi, that you probably already have what you need. If so, move on from possessions and get long-lasting happiness by doing these two things: Continue reading “Has Your Pursuit of the Material Been at the Expense of Happiness?”

Finding Times Tough? Do You Destroy What You Want When it Arrives? (Part 7 of 7)

Sunset Dec 2011This story is surprisingly common.

The day arrives and you get what you want.

Do you celebrate and accept it?

Or are you suspicious of it, do you shake your head in disbelief?

Most people question and doubt the outcome!

If you are someone who doubts, then catch yourself, stop it and just accept the good fortune that YOU created.

 “Circumstances – what circumstances? I make circumstances.”

~~ Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

This is Part 7 of a 7-Part Series “Are You Finding Times Tough?”

In parts 1 – 6, you learned

  • how to take charge of your life
  • the benefits of taking responsibility for your life
  • how to turn your life around
  • how to take action
  • an easy way to start letting go of your old life
  • how to act as if you already have the life you want

…to move yourself into a new exciting and happy life.

Don’t Question It – It’s Yours

Sometimes what we want arrives quite suddenly as if from nowhere, and it surprises us. Out of the blue we go from not having, to having. Perhaps it’s the suddenness that causes suspicion and bewilderment. We find ourselves saying things like, ‘Now that’s weird, how can this be happening?’

My advice is: When you get what you want, be very aware of your reaction. Don’t say, ‘I don’t believe it’ or ‘Okay yeah, but what about all my other problems’.

We do this even in everyday situations such as hearing nothing after a job interview but after calling the organization discover the job is yours. A few things don’t add up and you’re tempted to find fault with the process or become suspicious about what took place. Don’t, just allow it. Be thankful.

Instead you can ‘blame’ the following – i.e. that you:

– had a can-do attitude
(see part 1 How to Take Charge Today and Get a Happy Life)
– took responsibility for your life
(see part 2 Can You Make This Simple Choice to Get the Happy Life You Want?)
– decided what you wanted
(see part 3 2 Easy and Effective Steps to Start Your Happy Life)
– took action
(see part 4 Take Action Today to Get Your Happy Life)
– let go of the old to allow the new
(see part 5 Make This Easy Change Today to Get Your Happy Life)
– acted ‘as if’ or pretended you already had what you want
(see part 6 Rebuild Confidence in Yourself Today to Get What You Want)

It’s true – these changed your reality and you moved into a circumstance where you can truly do and have what you want.

If You Question What You’ve Received, it May Disappear

When you question, it means Continue reading “Finding Times Tough? Do You Destroy What You Want When it Arrives? (Part 7 of 7)”

Finding Times Tough? Re-Build Confidence in Yourself Today and Get What You Want (Part 6 of 7)

In tough times your confidence can get a little shaky.

Be assured this is only temporary because confidence is directly controlled by your thoughts.

By giving yourself appropriate thoughts and a new perspective you’ll re-build your confidence.

This is Part 6 of a 7-Part Series “Are You Finding Times Tough?”

In parts 1 – 5, you learned

  • how to take charge of your life
  • the benefits of taking responsibility for your life
  • how to turn your life around
  • how to take action
  • an easy way to start letting go of your old life

…to bring in a new exciting and happy life.

“The frontier between hell and heaven is only the difference between two ways of looking at things.

~~George Bernard Shaw (1856 – 1950)

It’s as Simple as Pretending

Pretending you’ve already got what you want is a trick you can play on your brain.

It may sound ridiculous but once you know how the brain works it makes sense.

Keep this up and it becomes true.

It helps to slowly and repeatedly say affirmations such as, ‘I now have (….insert what you want….)’.

See each word separately in your mind.
Write out the sentences a few times and place them around your home and workstation.

Even if you disagree or doubt it the first few times, these words fire neurons in your brain, your brain believes them and they build your confidence.

A glimmer of hope develops in you. Do it and you’ll see.

As you repeat these and the neurons in your brain continue to fire the words, a new world of opportunity starts to open up and your confidence gains momentum.

It starts to be real.
Opportunities appear in your life as if from nowhere and you feel different.

Note: This article is also a good follow on from Part 3 – Finding Times Tough? 2 Easy and Effective Steps to Start Your Happy Life.

If You Want to, Allow the Feelings of Despair – But Only For a While

If you feel desperate, allow those feelings and be conscious you’re allowing them.

This is to allow yourself to have this experience.

Then stand up straight with your shoulders back and decide that’s enough. Wallowing in despair is easy and comfortable in contrast to being strong.

Being strong isn’t easy but it will take you to the other side of tough times and a happy life. Being strong aligns you with a path that opens up new opportunities… so be ready for them.

New opportunities can’t appear if you are wallowing in self-pity. You’ll never see the opportunity from down there.

Knowledge helps you become strong, it gives you security. Keep up with your learning about how life works.

When Your Opportunities Arrive Acknowledge Them

You’ll notice miracles start to happen if Continue reading “Finding Times Tough? Re-Build Confidence in Yourself Today and Get What You Want (Part 6 of 7)”

Finding Times Tough? Make this Easy Change Today to Get Your Happy Life (Part 5 of 7)

Get big results from small changes.

Here’s another simple effective tip to bring about change in your life and to bring in your dream even faster.

This is Part 5 of a 7-Part Series “Are You Finding Times Tough?”

An overview of parts 1 – 4 is at the bottom of this post or click below to read.

Part 1 Finding Times Tough? How to Take Charge Today and Get a Happy Life
Part 2 Finding Times Tough? Can You Make This Simple Choice to Get the Happy Life You Want?
Part 3 Finding Times Tough? 2 Easy and Effective Steps to Start Your Happy Life 
Part 4 Finding Times Tough? Take Action Today to Get Your Happy Life

Tip: Change Your Daily Activities Somehow, Even a Little

If you think about it, what you’ve been thinking and doing most of your life has created your current direction and situation, correct?

Repetition becomes dull and boring.

So change it up.

That is, if you want to change direction.

This simply means change the places you go each day, the roads on which you travel, what you eat, where you buy your coffee… change who you talk to, what you watch and read and even… where you sit at the dinner table.

Only little things, nothing big.

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Albert Einstein (1879 – 1955)

Contemplate what you do each day and pinpoint possible areas to change.

Importantly surround yourself with inspiration: in people, books, movies and/or make time for a hobby that inspires you.

Make conscious changes.

Change Means a New Direction – New is Exciting

By making a few simple changes, you turn yourself to face a new direction. When you face a new direction the view is different, life looks different and parts of it will be new. Voilà. Yes, new opportunities are able to come into view. New is always exciting for us. A happy life is an exciting life.

How to Let Go of Your Old Life to Say Hello to the New Continue reading “Finding Times Tough? Make this Easy Change Today to Get Your Happy Life (Part 5 of 7)”

Finding Times Tough? Take Action Today to Get Your Happy Life (Part 4 of 7)

“Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence.
Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear.
Perhaps the action you take will be successful; perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow.

But any action is better than no action at all.

~~ Norman Vincent Peale

(American Protestant Clergyman and Writer 1893-1993)

This is Part 4 of a 7-Part Series “Are You Finding Times Tough?”

Part 1 Finding Times Tough? How to Take Charge Today and Get a Happy Life teaches you:
– How to take charge of your life
– A simple way to gain confidence

Part 2 Finding Times Tough? Can You Make This Simple Choice to Get the Happy Life You Want? explains:
– What taking responsibility for the state of your life means
– And what’s in it for you

Part 3 Finding Times Tough? 2 Easy and Effective Steps to Start Your Happy Life explains how to:
Find wisdom and gain confidence from tough times
– 2 steps that will start your happy life
– How to get a 22-step recipe for your happy life

Okay, so you’ve decided what you want and you now have a story describing your ideal life.

That’s terrific because you need to know what you want.
Imagine driving your car not knowing what direction you’re going in.

Now what comes next?

Take Action to Get What You Want

When I first started intentionally creating what I wanted, I’d sit back and wait.

I didn’t know any better. And ultimately I got what I wanted just by writing a story or making a list of what I wanted, as suggested in Part 3 2 Easy and Effective Steps to Start Your Happy Life .

But today I know the benefits of taking action and I also enjoy taking action.

I’ve found I have more fun along the way – my journey is more exciting, I overcome more fears, develop greater confidence in what I’m doing and my result becomes even greater.

Why Does Taking Action Help?

Humans carry a lot of baggage.

We all have baggage.

This baggage can weigh us down, distract us, create fear, cause doubts and delay our ideal future.

By saturating your life every day with this new future, it keeps you aligned to your goal – it releases that baggage and keeps you motivated and on track.

What Benefits Do You Get By Taking Action? Continue reading “Finding Times Tough? Take Action Today to Get Your Happy Life (Part 4 of 7)”