Why it’s a Trap for You to Tow the Line

If you want to live a happy life, stop towing the line.

This is part 2 of a 2-part series. Part 1 Do You Think for Yourself? introduced you to the unwritten rules of society and suggested that you probably follow them without realizing it. Towing the line gives you the illusion of a happy life but deep down you feel robbed.

“The reward for conformity was that everyone liked you except yourself.”

~~ Rita Mae Brown (American Writer b. 1944)

This article is a little different to my others in that while it tells you how to become greater, it also delivers to  you the stark reality of towing the line i.e. the downsides… and it is a downward spiral. By reading it I am hoping you will be motivated to take action, to step forward and courageously push aside those rules. To be free to live the happy life of your choosing.

The Hazards of Towing the Line …The 10 Steps to Hitting Rock Bottom in Your Life

Do you recognize this pattern, this downward spiral? (Some parts may seem tinged with sarcasm – that is not the intention. It is however the truth.)

  1. At first, you’ll feel honorable. Initially, this is what you feel by conforming. It’s your (short-term) reward for doing so.
  2. Then you’ll feel accepted as people appear to warm to you and praise you for being such a good person. Praise is a deep need for most people and it makes you believe you’re an essential part of the group, the tribe.
  3. You’ll feel safe, loved and secure because you think the tribe will protect you. You consider yourself to be doing the ‘right thing’ since you’ve made a good impression. Note: Unbeknownst to you, this is the last time you will feel good. At this point you start on the never-ending downward cycle.
  4. It starts to dawn on you that the love and protection you receive is conditional and to keep it you must keep following the rules – you must keep towing the line. Fact: the love and protection are conditional; you subconsciously know this and that there are consequences if you stray. This is where my book Just Like That! comes in. It explains that while there are certainly consequences if you stop towing the line, they pass quickly if Continue reading “Why it’s a Trap for You to Tow the Line”

Do You Think for Yourself? Here’s How to Start

Are you free to do what you want?

Or do you do what is expected of you?

You’ll probably find that without even knowing it, you follow ‘the rules’ and conform.

Obviously if you’re paid to do a job, do it.

For this purpose we’re talking about mindlessly following the unwritten rules of society; things you’ve never agreed to and you’re not paid to do.

If you have never contemplated this, then it’s likely you’ve fallen into line whether or not it’s for your benefit. Just by reading this paragraph however, you may have a lightning bolt moment; a sudden awareness about how you’re living your life.

To have confidence and a happy life, you ought to think for yourself.

“Gonna change my way of thinking, make my self a different set of rules.

Gonna put my good foot forward and stop being influenced by fools.”

Bob Dylan (American singer-songwriter and musician b. 1941)

If this Idea Pushes a Button Look Closer

This can be a touchy subject because we all like to think we’re independent thinkers, but we can’t escape the truth.

If you didn’t have a lightning bolt moment, ask yourself if this topic pushes a button for you. Does it make you uncomfortable, even a little?

If an idea pushes a button it means it applies to you in some way whether you hide from it or not.

Towing the line takes us away from what we want in life. But most people are doing it so let’s face it and acknowledge at least that you now know.

Now we can take action to liberate you and deliver to you that happy life instead.

Since I’ve had the luxury of learning I’m ‘free to be me’ and every day actively choose to be that, I’ve felt my heart soar, I’ve had a beautiful sense of liberation, confidence and I wake up even happier, with an even greater can-do attitude.

The Results Are In – You Are Free to Be You

Unfortunately, until we’re reminded that we’re free (to be whoever and whatever we want to be), we continue towing the line, doing what we think impresses others and keep trying to make ourselves more acceptable or more significant in the eyes of others.

We seldom do anything that contradicts what’s expected of us, for fear of losing the love and approval of others.

We robotically follow the rules of society – subconscious rules we’ve been indoctrinated to follow since childhood.

The rules determine what is deemed good behavior, and what isn’t.

We unconsciously know ‘good’ from ‘bad’ and we stick to being ‘good’.

Our daily life involves striving to be a glowing example of what is seen as living an ‘impressive life’.

The consequence? Continue reading “Do You Think for Yourself? Here’s How to Start”

Are You Ready to Be Well? Get Breakthrough Healing with Alternative Health Medicine

You decide your own health. Do you accept what your doctor tells you? Would you accept without question the diagnosis of a ‘terminal’ illness or even a common ailment such as eczema, asthma?

Would you rather turn your back on illness and bounce into radiant health? If so, there’s good news. Alternative health medicine gives you choice. Every day there are more major breakthroughs in alternative health medicine. If you have an open mind, you give yourself a gift of greater possibilities and solutions… there are numerous compelling alternatives if you’re willing to look.

To give you an insight to what is already possible, even for those supposedly ‘impossible’ diseases see an extract below from my book Just Like That ! How to Get Anything You Want[i]

“Keep on going, and the chances are that you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it.  I never heard of anyone ever stumbling on something sitting down.”

Charles F. Kettering

(American engineer and inventor of the electric starter motor, who held

140 patents and owned the company Delco, later sold to General Motors,1876–1958)

   Anything Is Possible – Even Healing Yourself

For some, the illness may be genetic, but contrary to popular opinion, these illnesses can also be healed through our thoughts. The label ‘genetic’ can seem huge and insurmountable, but do yourself a favour and imagine the disease as small and insignificant, but totally curable. There is nothing to lose and everything to gain. Give your fabulous brain every opportunity to heal you.

You already have the best answer in you, but keep in mind that new solutions are continually becoming available – never give up the search. Consider the emergence of neuroplasticity; the discovery that the brain can change itself. This impressive discovery reignited the hopes of millions of people affected by cerebral palsy, learning disabilities, dyslexia, schizophrenia and many other neurological issues; the list goes on. One of the best aspects is that many of the radical improvements are achieved through the mind, eliminating the need for operations or medication.

Additionally, neuroplasticity has demonstrated our ability to turn genes on and off through our thinking. Continue reading “Are You Ready to Be Well? Get Breakthrough Healing with Alternative Health Medicine”

The 6 Hazards of Waiting for a Different Future

We’re often told to stay away from the past.

But did you know that it’s also futile to brood constantly about the future?

Anything other than ‘in the moment’, ‘in the NOW’, is unproductive.

“With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.

Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 – 1882, American lecturer and poet. Champion of individualism.)

To help you get what you want, this is Part 4 of a 4-Part series – Why Being in the Moment Gets You What You Want

Parts 1, 2 and 3
10 Magic Reasons Living in the Moment Gets You What You Want
The 5 Hazards of Obsessing About the Past
How do You Know if You Are Living in the Past?

6 Reasons Why Living in the Future Can’t Get You What You Want

  1. You can only be effective in creating and influencing your future while being in the moment. If you’re living in your future, life is as unfulfilling as if you were in the past. If your mind is in the future you’re wishing and hoping for something from today, but you aren’t consciously and intentionally creating it now. To create what you want you must be in the moment, in the ‘now’.
  2. You’re missing the fun of today. If you’re constantly planning ahead, you’re missing out on the happiness you could be having today.
  3. If you put off doing what you want for the future, that is where it will stay. Get creative today about doing what you want today – every day. Then you’ll have your future happening today.
  4. If you’ll only be happy in the future, then happiness stays in the future i.e. if you’ll only be happy once you have your new home, a holiday, a car, clothes etc, then your happiness won’t ever be right now. It’s not good enough to be momentarily happy on big occasions. Take steps to make every day special – it’s yours if you want it. For more ideas on how to do that read Discover the First Key Element to Getting What You Want.
  5. You create anxiety by living in the future. Obsessing about the future can create fear about what might happen. Anxiety prevents you from moving into the most ideal and satisfying day because you get what you think i.e. more anxiety. Continue reading “The 6 Hazards of Waiting for a Different Future”

How do You Know if You are Living in the Past?

If you live in the past, you don’t get what you want.

When you are consciously present in the moment you get what you want.

So, if you want to leave behind living in the past… read on to discover how.

To help you get what you want, this is Part 3 of a 4-Part series – Why Being in the Moment Gets You What You Want.

In Parts 1 and 2 you learned the 10 Magic Reasons Living in the Moment Gets You What You Want and The 5 Hazards of Obsessing About the Past.

Question: How do you know if you are living in the moment, in ‘the now’?

Answer: If you are aware of your thoughts and emotions, then you are present and in the moment.

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

Anaïs Nin (1903 – 1977, French-Cuban author)

Listed below are 27 everyday situations, clues to help you recognize when you are living in the past. Along with each clue is what you’d do if you were instead ‘being present’.

By the way, you’ll notice that living in the past is largely driven by unhelpful emotion whereas emotion disappears in the present… you are calm.

27 Everyday Clues: You are Living in the Past When:

  1. You react to circumstances without thinking; you impulsively judge a situation as good or bad. For example, you receive an email and instantly judge the contents as one way or the other. Being present: You acknowledge that you don’t yet fully understand the bigger picture – you allow whatever it is to be part of a greater outcome for you.
  2. You judge differences as good or bad. You may have a preference and go for what you want, but if something is not ideal or good for you, it isn’t therefore ‘bad’. Being present: You allow situations or options to just ‘be’ neither. You have no reaction.
  3. You speak without thinking, without awareness. Do you ever say, ‘I am sick of…’, ‘I’d die for a…’? Being present: You’re aware of what you’re saying – you say only that which you truly want.
  4. You expect something bad to happen, ‘because it always does’. Being present: You know that you create only the best for you – getting what you want becomes a habit, a healthy habit.
  5. You don’t want to change i.e. you avoid new ideas, you won’t accept responsibility for your circumstances, you refuse to see yourself in others, you want life to stay the same, you want people to feel sorry for you. Being present: You’re flexible, willing to learn and invite change – you see change as an opportunity for adventure and greater happiness. Also read Discover the First Key Element to Getting What You Want.
  6. You can’t let go of controlling a circumstance and its outcome. Being present: You create what you want and allow it to unfold in the most ideal way, uniquely for you.
  7. You can’t accept someone for who they are. Do you constantly try to change people e.g. your partner, child, friend? Being present: You allow others to be who they are and instead look only to changing yourself to satisfy the lack you notice in them. By doing this you give others the gift of acceptance and yourself an opportunity to grow. How to do this is in my book “How to Get Anything You Want – Just Like That!”
  8. You control others, their life. Being present: You’re at peace with how others choose to live their lives and how they choose to behave. You receive the same gift from others.
  9. You can’t let someone go e.g. a friendship, partner. Being present: You calmly know that as one person leaves your life you’re inviting someone else in – someone more suited to who you have become and who will help you grow in different ways. Continue reading “How do You Know if You are Living in the Past?”